Making changes in family life is often a group project. Children may be more motivated to change when they see others trying to change as well—especially when those other people are their parents. Your transparency about your own weakness can be an encouragement to your kids.
Many parents have their anger meters set too tight. They react with intensity for even the smallest infraction of the rules. James 1:19-20 is helpful for us all to memorize: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry, for a man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” Character qualities like patience, persistence, and self-control help both children and parents to increase the tolerance level on their anger meter.
One single dad told us, “One morning, I got up, looked in the mirror and didn’t recognize the person I had become. I realized that I needed to make some changes in myself. Anger and bitterness were making me a hurtful person. As I began working on my own thoughts, feelings, and reactions, I was able to respond differently to life’s struggles. I was then surprised to see my kids change in response to what they saw in me. Things started moving in a positive direction for my family.”
Set the example for change in family life. Talk openly with your kids about the changes you’d like to see and the changes you’re working on in your own life. You may be surprised to find them following along behind you.
This parenting tip comes from the book Good and Angry, Exchanging Frustration for Character in You and Your Kids by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller, RN, BSN.
1 comment:
This is a good one. I think more parenting tips should be posted here.
By the way, I usually only look at the changes I like to see from them, but rarely pay attention to the changes on my own :-(
Ken
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